Expressions of gratitude have a number of positive effects, such as helping us savor pleasurable experiences, manage stress, and strengthen relationships, researchers have found. In negotiation and other contexts, showing gratitude also motivates those we thank to keep on giving.
In a series of experiments, researchers Adam M. Grant and Francesca Gino examined why expressions of gratitude motivate helpful acts. In one experiment, student participants were asked to edit another student’s job application cover letter. Students who were thanked for their help felt socially valued, such that they were more than twice as likely as those who were not thanked to help edit a second cover letter for the same person.
Helpers’ sense of being socially valued had more impact on their future willingness to help than did any positive mood or sense of competence that was generated by being thanked. The results show the power of a simple thank-you to inspire cooperation.
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Why “Thank You” Matters in Negotiation
These findings have many implications for anyone who works in a team setting. For one, that the helpers were motivated based on the creation of a feeling of social value rather than self-efficacy shows that while thanking co-workers and employees for their contributions may not improve their skills, it is definitely a helpful tool for maximizing their potential. Additionally, the experiments show that just thanking someone for a job well done could not only make it easier to negotiate with that person later on but also that this is liable to improve cooperation throughout your organization.
Thinking creatively to ensure that each person involved in a negotiation walks away from the deal happy can be challenging. Fortunately, fostering an environment that will promote win-win negotiations is easy.
Find the Right Leadership Voice
When the poet Walt Whitman wrote, “Surely, whoever speaks to me in the right voice, he or her shall I follow,” he conveyed the notion that persuasive communication is fundamental to effective leadership. Whitman’s words also underscore the importance of shaping leadership communications to meet individual concerns, interests, and styles.
When deciding how to communicate, recognize that the words you choose, such as a simple thank you, reveals something about you and your relationship with the person you are trying to lead.
Share a story below of how a simple thank-you in negotiation turned things around for you.
Adapted from “Why It Pays to Give Thanks,” first published in the Negotiation newsletter, November 2010 and “Real Leaders Negotiate” by Jeswald Salacuse for the May 2006 issue.
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Build powerful negotiation skills and become a better dealmaker and leader. Download our FREE special report, Negotiation Skills: Negotiation Strategies and Negotiation Techniques to Help You Become a Better Negotiator, from the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School.
Completely agree. Thank you is very effective and has no cost.
Saying “Thankyou” is a kind of gratitute. Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression. Grateful people are more likely to behave in a prosocial manner, even when others behave less kindly.
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Thank you is a powerful word and leaves a very good impact on another person during conversation. It’s so easy to express your gratitude by saying thanks and its a kind of acknowledgement that someone has done something good for you.
very informative. I was able to do my assignment on negotiation skills and passed with credits. Thanks for the excellent information.
This expression of gratitude, not only thank you, but the kind of you show your intention, can be the better way of solving the conflict in negotiation, and increase the confidence between customer and salesman.
I see this every day in my job. When I have an adverse situation or some conflict with employees or customer. Show humility is essential in this case.
Thank you is one of the powerful words that makes the conversation more impactful.
Thank You!
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Thanks!